A Visualization- July 7, 2022

Therapy was a tough one today. I felt last August again; all of my dreams and and them crashing down. An image or scene came to mind that was beautiful, yet devastatingly sad.

I saw a field of poppy flowers like the scene in The Wizard of Oz when they finally make it to the Emerald City. I felt my poppy seed in my heart and soul. Then I saw her. I saw her as a 3 or 4 year old girl with Michael's curly dark hair skipping through the flowers and calling my name: "Mommy." I wished I could just dive in and live in that scene forever, but I can't. It is somewhere over the rainbow. I see the image floating away in Glinda's bubble out of reach.

Oh, how I wish I could know her, hold her, see her grow. The only solace I I have is knowing she will never experience pain or sorrow or fear- only love and peace in Heaven. though I want to hold her now, I'll have to wait to meet her.

I know she isn't alone. She has Hawthorn. I can picture him too, maybe age 2, holding her hand and running through the flowers together. He has golden brown hair more like me.

I hope they can feel my love and know that I wish nothing more than to still have them. But a life in Heaven experiencing God's love and eternal peace is a comforting thought, though difficult.